Wednesday 31 October 2012

Vietnam May Have Got It Right

Two Vietnamese musicians have been jailed after being warned not to write anymore songs but deciding to go ahead and pen a couple of ditties anyway.
Amnesty International said: 'This is a ludicrous way to treat people just for writing songs' but hold on Amnesty, let's not be too hasty here.
Granted the tunes were anti-state songs critical of the Vietnamese government but i know a few song writers that would benefit all of us if we started banging up anyone who is an affront to music.
First in the dock getting life with no parole would be Paul McCartney for pretty much everything since 1970 and following him in would be Rod Stewart and Phil Collins for clogging up my radio with tosh for as long as i can remember. 
Billy Ray Cyrus deserves a spell in solitary for 'Achy Breaky Heart' in the cell next to Celine 'My Heart Will Go On' Dion and if someone had arrested the Village people after 'YMCA' we would have been spared 'In the Navy'. Bob Marley should have been locked away for a long time for having a career which consisted of every song having the same tune and Meatloaf should face a jury for making every song 10 minutes long.
A suspended sentence should be handed down to country music singers and anyone who uses an Hawaiian guitar in their songs, Mariah Carey for that wobbly voice thing she does where she goes up and down the scales mid-song, actors who think they can sing, comedy singers and boy bands who sing vaguely remembered 70's ballads with their shirts off and any band who sells the rights of their songs to advertisers and ruin that special song by forever being associated with kitchen roll.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

clever lucy,

apparently in vietnam they believe the pen is mightier than the sword... wonder if the 2 prisoners agreee?

q

Lucy said...

Maybe we could look at it as giving the two of them precious song writing time. Then again, maybe not.