Tuesday 29 May 2007

Putting The Great Into Great Britain

In his long and drawn out resignation speeches to groups of handpicked supporters, Tony Blair has taken to finishing his speeches with the words "Great Britain is the best in the World".
Exactly what Tony thinks Britain is the best at is anybodies guess.
Healthcare? Sweden top that league table.
Entertainment? America knock us into a cocked hat.
Football, our national sport? Italy are the World Champions there chummy.
Television shows? America again.
Music? Not since the 70's grandad.
Industry? Don't even go there.
So just what can Blair be possibly thinking of when he says we are the best?
Darts.
In Phil Taylor we have the 13 times World Champion, sweeping aside all comers from every corner of the globe.
Yes, we excel at a pub game where overweight men in shiny shirts throw sharp objects.
The thought brings a tear to your eye doesn't it. Much like the players taste in shirts actually.

24 comments:

The Fez Monkey said...

Football, our national sport? Italy are the World Champions there chummy.

Ahem. Four Time world champions, thank you very much. And England's lone title in 66 now stands as more a monument to failed promise than a testament to past achievement.

As you were.

Ook ook

hema said...

say what you want about Tony Blair, the guy had some charisma, i think i'm going to miss him.

hey, Britain is the best at lots of things, like.. like..
i shall have to get back to you, but i will think of something!

Anonymous said...

From what I understand, you guys make a really good cup of tea.

Falling on a bruise said...

I wont hold my breath Hema!!

We do Joe, using our Indian tea bags of course.

hema said...

i've got it!
i'd say Britain is good at being tolerant compared to some of the other places in the world.
i mean you've got to admit, you can't get more multicultural than central London. can you?

Deadman said...

When you're not busy shooting Brazilians, of course...

:o/>

Cheezy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cheezy said...

I think Britain is best at being modest and understated about, erm, Britain!

I also think this sceptred isle is full over some real 'funny bastards' i.e. we have some wickedly good comedians. And Lenny Henry too.

And I have to disagree with Lucy about the music... I'd say that it's improved a helluva lot since the 70s. e.g. Who's better - Genesis or Chemical Brothers?

I would go on, but as I say, we're modest and understated over here :)

Daniel said...

I'd have said that Britain has started to 'grate' on the world since Tony fell in love with George. Grate Britain indeed!

Cheers!

Cody Bones said...

Lucy, I can honestly say that in my business, finance, Great Britain is an extremely healthy competitor. London can rival New York for financial capital of the world.

Cheezy said...

Awwww, thanks Cody. That was a nice thing to say about us... and I'll tell all my finance-working London colleagues... as soon as the lazy bastards get back from the pub! ;-p

Anonymous said...

You have the bands that started a couple of the most innovative periods in music...The Beatles and The Sex Pistols. Okay, so nothing really recent (Coldplay, anyone? thought not), but I'll still give you a big HUZZAH! on the dart prowess!

Falling on a bruise said...

Genesis or Chemical brothers. That's the original choice between a rock and a hard place.
The best British quality to my mind is our ability to not take ourselves very seriously and to laugh at ourselves.
I also like your idea of Britain being very tolerant Hema, our multicultural stew is something i am proud of here.

Falling on a bruise said...

Coldplay CD's are what our darts players use to practise with Dangerdoll.
Genesis, Chemical Brothers, Coldplay & Lenny Henry. How depressing.
Anyone know how i can claim Canadian citizenship?

O' Tim said...

I mussay y'all have some mighty fine bloggers [smoochie-smooch]!

Deadman said...

"Anyone know how i can claim Canadian citizenship?"

Start wearing snowshoes and drinking Molson's, eh?

Falling on a bruise said...

Talking of canadians, whatever happened to that hunk of a guy who played Benton in Due South?

Anonymous said...

"Anyone know how i can claim Canadian citizenship? "

You'd give up Genesis for Lenny Kravitz???????

Genesis with Peter Gabriel was a great band. Without PG, yeah they sucked.

And you guys had Pink Floyd, don't forget.

Falling on a bruise said...

I think Genesis and Phil Collins pops into my head. *shudder*

Anonymous said...

Well, that's fine if he's behind the drum kit where he belongs..... :-)

Looney said...

Football, our national sport? Italy are the World Champions there chummy.

Eh, so you can't put together a WC squad to save your lives...

Who cares? The EPL is by far the pinnacle of football. Compared ot EPL, watching Serie A is like watching bread grow moldy...

Looney said...

That's "The POWER" to you, missy...

:-)

The Fez Monkey said...

Who cares? The EPL is by far the pinnacle of football. Compared ot EPL, watching Serie A is like watching bread grow moldy...

Well, the style of play may be less than thrilling, but as AC Milan showed, the quality is there.

And what about La Liga?

Ook ook

Looney said...

EPL kicks arse. They *tackle*!!!!

I mean, rilly-rilly-rilly tackle :-)

Much more fun, IMHO...