Saturday 28 April 2007

Shatner In Space

Richard Bransons plans to begin Space Tourism in 2009 is ploughing along nicely and is at such an advanced stage that the initial flight to the stars at £200,000 a seat, is taking bookings. Financially out of reach of most common or garden human's, the beardy Virgin boss is reporting a strong interest from celebrities and stating that the maiden voyage will be filled to the gills with our planets finest include Victoria Principal, William Shatner, Paris Hilton, Morgan Freeman, Madonna, Prince Harry and Sigourney Weaver.
Now far be it from me to hope that this fine bunch of actors, royals, singers and whatever it is Paris Hilton does, be stranded on some far flung planet but this would not be my first choice of companions on trip to the local newsagents, let alone into space.
My concern is that as this fine crew are pinging through space, we meet up with an alien life form and this bunch are our representatives of Planet Earth. Christ, we would be incinerated as a waste of atmosphere.
Either we send up some proper people who won't make us all look like arse's in the unexpected event of inter-planetary communication or at least cut the fuel pipe.
And as movies have shown us, i would certainly avoid avoid arming Sigourney Weaver or letting Shatner anywhere near a script.

7 comments:

Mark said...

How do we round up the ENTIRE Hollywood asstard crew and shoot them permanently into space?

Anonymous said...

'Celebrities' want to be shot into space, dead or alive, it seems.

Paula said...

I guess we can't send up all the rightwingnutjobs then, as they'd give the aliens a *really* bad impression. Bummer!

Falling on a bruise said...

How about we just tell the rightwingnutjobs its a spaceship but actually sit them inside a large cruise missile. That would look so pretty as their ashes flutter back to earth.

Anonymous said...

"whatever it is Paris Hilton does"


I think "whore" might be the word you seek.......

O' Tim said...

Hey! Whatcha got against Morgan Freeman?

Falling on a bruise said...

Thats close enough Joe, or slapper, either is good.

Got to admit i quite like Morgan Freeman but he has one of those ways of speaking that just seems that bit too slow. Not that i would banish him to a distant planet for that he would have to take one for the team i fear.